Ohio Contamination (repost)
2/23/03
The Center for Disease Control declared Ohio to be contaminated. While the contamination is unexplained, a thousand “unremarkable” deaths over the last two weeks cause concern for CDC. These deaths, equally distributed in Cleveland, Cincinnati, Dayton, Columbus, and Toledo, are under investigation. The state is under quarantine. No one may leave or enter Ohio. If visiting, make yourself comfortable; it may be awhile. If residents are away at this time, consider taking the wife and kids next time, given the chance.
So far, the state is functioning to full capacity except airports and bus terminals. It seems Ohio does more inter- than intrastate business. The quarantine is working well. Some individuals in Cincinnati and Erie, though, thought to “beat the system” by crossing over into Kentucky and Pennsylvania. Unfortunately, all they accomplished is to put those states at risk in their thoughtlessness. At the very least, these incidents shed light on the issue of defining state lines more clearly.
Physical activity in Ohio is up. By physical activity, I mean sex. Close, personal contact, comforting in the aftermath of 9/11, is on the rise. Pregnancy is no longer an issue is the minds of Ohioans since death may be one week or one month away.
Many residents find it difficult to maintain their daily schedules. Some businesses report feeling the impact of a significantly-reduced work force.
The entertainment industries are booming. If the quarantine holds, this trend should continue. Of course, once the pocket or purse is empty, other means will be sought.
False Alarm
CDC issued a statement today lifting the quarantine on Ohio. The thousand deaths were weather-related and not a cause for concern.
Years Later
Ohio is facing a new baby boom not seen since 1960. The quarantine of 2003 helped to ensure a 25% increase in the number of residents.
Also, unemployment is still high in Ohio. Those people who varied their daily schedules during the quarantine are still unemployed.
The Center for Disease Control declared Ohio to be contaminated. While the contamination is unexplained, a thousand “unremarkable” deaths over the last two weeks cause concern for CDC. These deaths, equally distributed in Cleveland, Cincinnati, Dayton, Columbus, and Toledo, are under investigation. The state is under quarantine. No one may leave or enter Ohio. If visiting, make yourself comfortable; it may be awhile. If residents are away at this time, consider taking the wife and kids next time, given the chance.
So far, the state is functioning to full capacity except airports and bus terminals. It seems Ohio does more inter- than intrastate business. The quarantine is working well. Some individuals in Cincinnati and Erie, though, thought to “beat the system” by crossing over into Kentucky and Pennsylvania. Unfortunately, all they accomplished is to put those states at risk in their thoughtlessness. At the very least, these incidents shed light on the issue of defining state lines more clearly.
Physical activity in Ohio is up. By physical activity, I mean sex. Close, personal contact, comforting in the aftermath of 9/11, is on the rise. Pregnancy is no longer an issue is the minds of Ohioans since death may be one week or one month away.
Many residents find it difficult to maintain their daily schedules. Some businesses report feeling the impact of a significantly-reduced work force.
The entertainment industries are booming. If the quarantine holds, this trend should continue. Of course, once the pocket or purse is empty, other means will be sought.
False Alarm
CDC issued a statement today lifting the quarantine on Ohio. The thousand deaths were weather-related and not a cause for concern.
Years Later
Ohio is facing a new baby boom not seen since 1960. The quarantine of 2003 helped to ensure a 25% increase in the number of residents.
Also, unemployment is still high in Ohio. Those people who varied their daily schedules during the quarantine are still unemployed.
posted by Vickie at 4:41 PM
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